Twas the night before Christmas….
On the other side of town….
A dad and a granddad were hunkered down.
It wasn’t a pretty sight; two grown men being challenged by a very large toy;
All for the joy of a one year old boy!
So my story begins on that Christmas Eve night so long ago.
As I recall, it began innocently after Thanksgiving through a phone call. “Mom,” our daughter Traci said, “We are at Toys R Us and decided to get the jungle gym for Neal’s Christmas. “However,” she hesitated, “it won’t fit into our Honda. Can you and Dad come in the truck and help us get it home?”
Todd and Traci were waiting on the parking lot; Traci was the epitome of a young mother gearing up for her child’s first Christmas, while Todd offset this image with the usual signs of early stress.
“Oh Mother its perfect!” I thought she was going to jump up and down and clap her hands with giddiness! Todd simply uttered, “It’s the biggest box I ever saw in my life!” There wasn’t a flicker of a smile; in fact the look of trauma was beginning as reality was setting in; on the other hand, our young mother was off in la- la- land.
“ It’s a wonderful jungle gym made out of durable plastic, and it only has five pieces; there is some assembly required but in less than five minutes!” Fear gripped my heart! I hadn’t heard those words in years and now, out of the mouth of my own daughter those vile, sanity reducing words were being repeated! “And I willingly of sound mind and body agreed to this,” I muttered under my breath. “What did you say?” Phil asked, all the while glaring at me. I had not only agreed but I had committed him as well.
The young Sumu wrestlers on the loading dock quipped, “This box isn’t going into that little truck!” After pushing, shoving and pulling, the box was finally crammed into the smaller-than-we-realized truck. “Where are you going to store this?” I foolishly asked.
“Well Mom,” we were hoping to keep it in your garage.” All eyes were on me; some friendly, some not.
“Sure,” I said. “It will just be for a few weeks; maybe it won’t rain too much; I have a heavy coat and parking on the street will be fine; it’s only the dead of winter! It will fit perfectly!” I was right; once in the garage there was no room for a car and barely a path to the door.
I actually got attached to this humongous box! Not everyone can have a challenge in locating the backdoor to their house; each day I faced this obstacle course and each day I conquered it! Phil asked how they were going to get it to their house. He went so far to suggest they carry one of the five “easy to assemble” pieces home each time they visited. “No worries,” he finally said,” I’ll bring it over in the truck the night before Christmas.”
The anticipated night arrived with little fanfare but plenty of stress. In spite of the pouring rain, I finished my shopping and got home with just enough time to unload the car before Todd arrived with the grandson, Neal. He would stay with me while Todd and Phil transported the jungle gym to their house for “quick” assembly. Traci had prepared dinner and like Tinker Bell was bubbling with energy. I, on the other hand resembled the crabby old lady on the Shoebox greeting card. Our other two teens were waiting for me to wrap their presents. I was facing a mound of gift wrapping, a one-year-old to corral pressured with the knowledge that the toy would be “assembled” in five minutes and everyone would be waiting on me.
Frantically I was down on my hands and knees wrapping gifts, chasing a toddler and screaming of bah-humbug! I didn’t notice two hours passed and no phone call from the other side of town. When the phone did ring I immediately recognized the frantic voice on the other end. “Mom,” her voice quivered. “when you come will you bring the large rubber mallet with you?” Instinctively I asked, “What’s wrong?”
The sobbing echoed through the phone. “This thing doesn’t fit together right! They have part of it together (sob sob) and it’s the wrong sides but now it won’t come apart! It’s locked into place (sob, sob) and it won’t budge! They’ve hit it, kicked it, slammed their bodies against it and it won’t move! Todd called the 1-800 number and then the store. The man said he put them together all the time; all you have to do is use brute force; then he said he weighs 280 pounds! Oh Mom! It’s just awful! This thing seems to have a mind of its own!” Sob, sob…..
I couldn’t help notice that this wonderful toy had been demoted to “this thing.” Life at my house for the past few hours hadn’t been pleasant but I knew life on the other side of town wasn’t safe! Two mad men were on the loose, ready to kill a mind manipulating toy disguised as a jungle gym.
We pulled into the driveway as Todd bolted out of the door. His 5’9 stature had been transformed into the Terminator while the color of his face took on the Hulk. It was evident visions of sugarplums weren’t dancing in his head, but he was having visions!
“ I’m going to get the hacksaw!” he yelled with a wild look in his eyes. He was rummaging through the tool box as tools flew through the air decorating the landscape. “I’m going to make that thing look like it’s been run through a shredder!” The Todd I knew was no more….
We were met by the saddest face of all; Traci’s lip quivered as the tears rolled down her cheeks.
“Oh Mother,” she threw her arms around me . “Can you believe this is happening?”
“No sweetheart; we always assembled your toys in five minutes or less!” I had always wanted to say that to somebody and I wasn’t about to pass up the chance now!
I hurried back to Neal’s room; it was bad. As I opened the door, this mammoth jungle gym consumed the room. Parts lay strewn on the floor while the aroma of plastic was stifling.
“What’s the problem?” I asked. Phil shot me a look that could kill as Todd came bounding through the door. He found the hacksaw! Fire was dancing in his eyes; this was now a face off! The toy was the enemy.
“How have you tried to get it apart?” I ventured. Todd began to demonstrate. He kicked, threw the full force of his body into it, and as the grand finale slugged it out with the rubber mallet. This thing didn’t budge but the vibrations shook the house!
I eased my way around the assembled parts. Carefully surveying each slotted piece I realized if I simply lifted up on one end and hit it forcefully it would dislodge.
“We already tried that,” Phil said through gritted teeth. “Maybe so,” I continued, “but I know that is how to get this thing apart.” Demonstrating my idea I continued to coax them. “Todd, I’ll hold this side like this and you hit this side like this and I think it will unlock.” The two men looked at each other and with smirks on both their faces decided to humor me. I grabbed hold of my “easy to assemble piece.” I locked my feet into place and yelled, “Hit it!”
Those are the last words I remember. Todd, with full force of his body hit his “easy to assemble piece.” The impact sent me flying across the room having my flight broken by a wall that refused to move. Dazed and slumped in a corner I could vaguely see Todd holding a large piece of plastic jungle gym.
“Kathy you were right! You were exactly right!” Within five minutes the jungle gym was in fact assembled. We all stood tall, drained and glowing surveying our accomplishment. We had mastered “some assembly required”. It wasn’t in five minutes but it was for Neal; it was worth it!
With Norman Rockwell images dancing in her head, Traci rounded the corner with the little toddler for whom all this love and affection was tested. We were waiting for his toddler enthusiasm; but none came. He simply stood staring.
“Neal,” Traci coaxed. “A jungle gym!” He circled it; then he circled it again. I now had visions of Joshua circling Jericho and walls tumbling down. He looked at us as he toddled out the door. Perplexed and realizing he wasn’t coming back, we followed. There, in the middle of the den floor was a happy toddler, crawling all over a big box!
History was repeating itself as it does with all children; the box is more fun than the toy.
That jungle gym was played with until both Neal, and eventually his sister Katy out grew it. They, along with the neighborhood kids enjoyed hours upon hours of outdoor fun, which is where it was always supposed to be: outdoors. What a memory that was and still is today. Now we laugh; then not so much. Traci and Todd were first time parents; Phil and I were first time grandparents. Now we have many grandchildren and even greats. We tend to take life a little more in stride.
Neal is now thirty and his little girl is going to celebrate her first real Christmas. They will make memories that will span time and hopefully the generations. As our family grew, with that growth came new ideas and traditions. One thing I do know is, we learn from each other, and I’ll go a step further: children are the best teachers. We can learn so much from them when we pay attention.
Looking back over two thousand years, I think it was the child in the manger who began teaching us.
Merry Christmas to all; and to all a good night!
