I’ll go…..
That is an old hymn I grew up singing; the words were just words in a hymnal with
little to no real meaning….until they were no longer just words on a page.

Just as the disciples left careers, homes, and families to follow Him, sometimes
that is the requirement. To leave all that is familiar for something unknown,
and unfamiliar; an act of obedience.
Our lives had been relatively normal as far as the Christian faith. Phil had asked
Jesus Christ into his heart and life as a boy, confirming that decision with water
baptism. For me, it was my early twenties. We became regular churchgoers
wanting our children to also follow the Lord. Church life was comfortable; we
were growing in our faith.
We had no idea our own story was getting ready to change and God was enlarging
our tent pegs.
It was early spring when our church had what was called a Lay Renewal Weekend;
over forty people from other towns and cities came for the weekend and shared
testimonies about a deeper walk with the Lord; one of commitment, making Him
Lord of our lives and allowing Him to show us a life of faith unlike anything we had
heard or ever known.
A few weeks later we both had a new fresh hunger for reading our Bibles. The
words began to come alive and the stories held our attention as never before. I
sought out books by authors who wrote about a Jesus I wanted to know better.
Where there was a speaker we were both there sitting with pen and paper
captivated by every word. Our prayer lives were becoming richer, real, caring for
not only our needs but the needs of others.
Then the Lord began to shake things up even more. Growing in faith can have
many facets but obedience in some form will always be in the mix. We had built
our dream house, been in it three years, when Phil felt like he wanted to make a
change in his career. A friend asked him to come work with him in the city and he
wanted to go check things out. I didn’t want to go.

That seemed to me like the longest weekend and we rode home in silence. Phil
was contemplating a career change; I was contemplating him getting an
apartment and coming home on weekends.
The following morning was a blur. The emotions of anticipating a life-changing
decision was daunting. Life was good; our oldest was leaving for college and the
other two were loving life. I had just graduated from college which was a dream
come true and although I had no plans past that, moving was not on my bucket
list. I went through the day trying to keep my thoughts and emotions intact.
Around bedtime a lady I barely knew called. Needing a phone number of a mutual
friend, unsolicited she said, “If your husband ever gets a job in another town
whatever you do- go with him. Families aren’t meant to be separated; I know too
well; just a word of advice learned the hard way.” When I hung up, I was stunned.
I had spent most of the day strategizing and moving was not in the plan for the
kids and me.
The next morning around eight o’clock in the morning the phone rang. Traci
answered and called up the stairs, “Mom it’s Ruby.” I hadn’t talked to Ruby since
she had moved a year earlier so it was a pleasant surprise to hear her voice or so I
thought. She told me where they were, how her husband had become a preacher,
her mother-in-law became a Christian and she said it was because of me. “When I
worked for you, you treated me like a Christian so I became one,” she said. She
didn’t stop there. “Sometimes you have to move for the Lord to do what He
wants to do in your life.” I was again stunned. Why this phone call now since she
had been gone well over a year.
“I’ve walked by this phone three times and the Lord told me to call and tell you
this; I didn’t want to but I finally decided I’m more afraid of the Lord than I am
you so I called.” By now she was laughing. I loved that laugh but I didn’t love what
she said: Sometimes you have to move for the Lord to do what He wants to do in
your life.
That afternoon I went out on to the porch, sat in the swing, and said, “Lord, what
about this house? We will have to rent it and that is a tall order. You rent this
house and then I’ll know we are moving.”

The following morning, another phone call. By now I was avoiding the phone.
When I finally answered a friend asked to come sit on my porch which was rather
unusual. She had only been to our house once or twice but I didn’t think much
about it. During the conversation, the Lord told me to tell her about us moving. I
dodged that thought.  But the thought persisted.  When I finally said, “ You’ll have
to come to Dallas to tell me the rest of that story” whatever the story was, she
replied, “what are you going to do with this house?” Unknown to me, she needed
a place to live and when she left that day I was holding a check.
I wish I could say the story ends at that point, I got the message, kept my word to
the Lord, but that didn’t happen.
Until the following day.
The phone rang; I was making breakfast. “Kathy Henigan,” she said, “This is
Martha Hopkins. I heard you graduated college.  Now what are you going to do?”
Again I was stunned. I was thirty-five years old, she was my teacher in both eighth
and ninth grades and I really didn’t even know she knew my name. There was not
a close connection of any kind.  I mumbled something about going to Bible school
if I could and she emphatically said, “I remember you being a person who set her
mind to things and got it done! So let the Lord open the door for you and you do
whatever it takes to make it happen! Nice talking to you; good bye.”
I slumped into a chair, laid my head on the table; we were moving.
That was thirty-eight years ago. At the time I thought God was punishing me; I
finally had the life I wanted only to feel the rug being pulled out from under me.
That wasn’t at all what was happening.
When we pray, “God I want You to order my steps; use me however You see fit”,
you’ve just possibly opened the door to a bigger life than you could imagine on
your own. It doesn’t always involve something as major as moving. But it did for
us.
Sometimes the familiar, comfortable and convenient can actually prohibit what’s
inside of you. I remember when Phil built his first ten million dollar addition to a
high school, the superintendent who asked him to come said, “And you would
have spent the rest of your life building FHA government homes when this was in
you all along.” Phil went on to run Bond Programs in the billions and build amazing
school structures. He would never have done that had we stayed in our
safe, familiar life. The opportunities were not there.
The high school program helping pregnant/parenting teens plus writing, Detours
& Dreams, would possibly not have happened. A fresh environment gave me new
insight and wisdom to pen the right words at the right time.
Leaving behind all that was comfortable was an act of obedience. And it was one
of uncertainty, some fear, apprehension and lots of faith. Reading the Old
Testament, in many ways I related to the Israelites leaving Egypt. They were
miserable in Egypt and excited about the Promised Land till they weren’t.

Transitions are hard especially when you like where you are and you think you are
in the Promised Land.
It also took forty years to get Egypt out of the Israelites; that was all they knew.
It’s taken many years for me to be at home. Leaving family and friends, the
people who knew us and did life with us through our kids or other connections,
was the hardest. To be known as a part of a community, only to pack up and go
where no one knew us and didn’t care who we were was often lonely. Some
friendships have roots that will last through time and distance but the majority
won’t. Through the years many relationships were reduced to Christmas cards. It
takes being present in the moment, the here and now, to keep relationships alive
and vibrant.
In some ways I was like Lot’s wife, reaching for the unknown while clinging to the
known. God, in His wisdom, made life to be progressive, always changing and
stretching those who seek. In my words, He reminds us to bloom where we are
planted. Sometimes that is easier said than done.
Phil and I are not the same people we were. Moving to a new place had many
Giants in the land; but when you know (four confirmations should do it!) God is
leading the way then you know you can trust Him. It was largely due to those
challenges that we aren’t the people we once were. When the giants are often
bigger than life you have two choices: live in fear or walk in faith. We both
learned there are times we have to face challenges afraid but it caused our faith
to become solid and strong. The Lord knew there would be bigger giants on our
journey and because of His love and training, we met each one with His grace and
strength.

It’s been quite the adventure and we are still growing, learning, and becoming
and always will till we move that final time to be with the Lord.
Wherever He leads I’ll go; I sang that song for years; I now know the words by
heart through experiencing His matchless love.
We continue to follow; best decision we ever made.

I will follow Him……
Selah

Kathy